Global Test

Brian Beutler directs my attention to the top ten finalists to become Hillary Clinton's campaign theme song.The major problem here is that a strikingly large proportion of these artists aren't even Americans. I mean: Shania Twain, Celine Dion? Is Clinton trying to tell us she's some sort of Canadian Communist? Tunstall's Scottish, U2 is Irish, it's all totally unacceptable. Brian says she should pick The Temptations, but I think Tina Turner is the way to go here. Retaining the loyalty of African-American women is the key to stopping Obama, and Turner is the best way to accomplish that and, as best I can tell, comes with no meaningful downside.

Meanwhile, Barack Obama's favorite musicians, according to Facebook, are Miles Davis, John Coltrane, Bob Dylan, Stevie Wonder, J.S. Bach, and the Fugees, making him the very model of the modern non-threatening black man. John Edwards cites Bruce Springsteen, Mary Chapin Carpenter, and Natalie Allyn Wakeley Sleeth as artists he likes.

Comments

You know, for somebody with Seven Mary Three on a playlist rather than in a rocket headed for the heart of the sun...

Posted by norbizness | May 24, 2007 12:43 PM

I realise this is tongue in cheek, but still, no recognisable downside to Tina Turner? How about the fact that it's the most overused song in politics?

Posted by Ginger Yellow | May 24, 2007 12:44 PM

Hey! She used to have "I'll Take You There" by the Staples Singers on the list. I voted for it. Now I see it's not even an option any more, replaced by Tina Turner. Also, the original list had two U2 songs on it. I am getting the feeling that they're not even counting the votes, since there's no transparency to the thing anyway.

Posted by Aaron | May 24, 2007 12:44 PM

If I was running mine would be the imperial march from the star wars ost.

Posted by pimp hand strikes! | May 24, 2007 12:46 PM

I vote for Stand by Your Man.

Posted by ostap | May 24, 2007 12:48 PM

Instead of Turner's "The Best," what about "You're the Best Around" from The Karate Kid? (not sure of actual song name)

Posted by T:Porter | May 24, 2007 12:50 PM

I hear Richardson's got Closer by NIN...

Posted by Chris_ | May 24, 2007 12:52 PM

What happened to War - what is it good for? I thought that was in the running. Damn.

And no God Save the Queen (sex pistols version)?

Posted by roger | May 24, 2007 12:56 PM

Anything but the fucking Police. If any candidate uses any of Sting's excremental output I'd be obliged to work full time to defeat them.

Posted by Tom Hilton | May 24, 2007 12:59 PM

Oh, no, Matthew. Tina Turner relocated to France. That is right out.

Posted by jhupp | May 24, 2007 12:59 PM

What she needs is Joan Jett's "Bad Reputation".

Why can I see the Kucinich campaign using the Irish Rovers' "Unicorn"?

Posted by Royko | May 24, 2007 1:00 PM

Hmmm... "Every little thing she does is magic, every little thing just turns me on". I don't know if that's the image she's trying to convey.

As for musical taste...I see yet another reason to vote for Obama here.

Finally, U2 is not unacceptable because they're Irish. Its because they suck.

Posted by Jim W | May 24, 2007 1:01 PM

I'd vote for Sleater-Kinney's Living in Exile myself. I wonder why it isn't on the list?

Posted by LaFollette Progressive | May 24, 2007 1:04 PM

This is a rather facinating glimse into the psyche, or at least hopeful wishes, of Team Clinton. Besides some obvious clunkers (can we somehow impeach U2?), nearly every song relates to either electoral and political inevitability ("Are You Gonna Go My Way," "Get Ready ('Cause Here I Come)," "Ain't No Stopping Us Now," "The Best"), or weird sexual attraction to Hillary ("Every Little Thing She Does is Magic," "(Then I saw Her Face, Now) I'm a Believer").

"I'll Take You There" is too fraught with 60's radicalism/protests, though is clearly the superior song mentioned here. It's removal, along with the crappy selection of Smash Mouth over the Monkees for "I'm a Believer" speaks to a general fear of people thinking about Hillary's 60s experiences.

Basically Hillary's people want us to think of her as an unstoppable political force who is also mega-sexy. And who also hates the Monkees.

Posted by Ben | May 24, 2007 1:06 PM

I don't care what party or what they stood for, I'd vote for any candidate who had the moxie to named Neil Young's "Rockin' the Free World" as their theme song. The fact that he's a (possibly ex-) Canadian makes it even *better*.

Posted by Ryan | May 24, 2007 1:09 PM

"Don't feel like Satan,
but I am to them
So I try to forget it,
any way I can."

Not sure if that's Moxie.

Posted by James Gary | May 24, 2007 1:13 PM

I find myself a little put-off by the fact that Hillary chose the Smash Mouth cover of "I'm a Believer" rather than the clearly superior (in my eyes anyway) original Monkees version.

Posted by Emes | May 24, 2007 1:15 PM

how come noone mentions the fugs?

Posted by burnout | May 24, 2007 1:19 PM

If she wants U2, she should use "Party Girl". It'd be funny.

Posted by strannix | May 24, 2007 1:21 PM

How about Weird Al's "You're Sort of Everything I Ever Wanted"?

Anyway, that list is not inspiring. Unless when you hear "The Best", in your head you see Ricky Gervais dancing to it on the original "The Office."

Posted by Trent | May 24, 2007 1:22 PM

Ooh Child, by the Five Stair Steps.

Hands down the best song to make anyone's campaign song, ever.

Sing it with me:

"Some day, yeah
We'll put it together and we'll get it all done
Some day
When your head is much lighter
Some day, yeah
We'll walk in the rays of a beautiful sun
Some day
When the world is much brighter"

Posted by Nasara | May 24, 2007 1:22 PM

what about "American Idiot"?

Posted by right | May 24, 2007 1:22 PM

Finally, my first opportunity on a Major Blog to mention in an almost-on-topic way that Michael Nesmith was a great singer/songwriter.

Posted by Dan | May 24, 2007 1:23 PM

More downside on Tina: One of her best songs "What's Love Got to Do With It?", is awfully close to being autobiographical for the Clintons. And from an album called Private Dancers!

But she is awesome and has legs for the ages.

Posted by JimPortlandOR | May 24, 2007 1:31 PM

I vote for "We Americans" by The Briefs.

All those purple track suits make me sick indeed.

Posted by xjerryx | May 24, 2007 1:33 PM

Sorry Ben.

I didn't see that you had already mentioned Hillary's slighting of the Monkees.

And I'll second Dan's comment regarding the under-appreciated songwriting skills of Michael Nesmith.

Though I personally think that this under-appreciation extends to the Monkees as a band as well.

Posted by Emes | May 24, 2007 1:36 PM

If I had to pick something for Hillary, I'd suggest "I Take My Chances" by Mary-Chapin Carpenter--if it's banal and mainstream, it's at least saying something, as opposed to all the basically content-free choices on the existing list.

Wait, there's the line "I lit another cigarette." Never mind. Oh, how about "Today," by Smashing Pumpkins--no, that's got "I'll tear my eyes out," can't use that. "Let's Run," by Le Tigre? No, the implied non-resoluteness of "..or we could suck!" pretty much outweighs the feminist-positivity aspect there....

Damn, this is hard. Whoever came up with "Don't Stop" for Bill Clinton's 1992 campaign deserves whatever they got paid.

Posted by James Gary | May 24, 2007 1:38 PM

According to Mark Penn's latest analysis, the key demographic groups in '08 will be the Semi-Indie Snob Contrarians and the Skim Macchiato Momfluvials.

Therefore: 'Mushaboom', by Feist.

Posted by RC | May 24, 2007 1:38 PM

almost-on-topic way that Michael Nesmith was a great singer/songwriter

almost-on-topic, twice removed, since I'm A Believer is actually a Neil Diamond song. the Monkees recorded it a year before he did, though.

Posted by cleek | May 24, 2007 1:39 PM

Well, if we're going with Tina Turner, I'd reco
"We Don't Need Another Hero".

Put out when it looked like Krazy Reagan was going to start a thermonuclear war with Russia and only Mel Gibson and a pack of mutants would survive. When ALL of the world would look like downtown Gaza.

"OUT OF THE RUINS
OUT FROM THE WRECKAGE
CAN`T MAKE THE SAME MISTAKE THIS TIME
WE ARE THE CHILDREN
THE LAST GENERATION
WE ARE THE ONES THEY LEFT BEHIND
AND I WONDER WHEN WE ARE EVER GONNA CHANGE
LIVING UNDER THE FEAR, TILL NOTHING ELSE REMAINS"

heh heh heh

Posted by Don Williams | May 24, 2007 1:43 PM

Obama has excellent musical taste.

Posted by Korha | May 24, 2007 1:46 PM

I hate to disappoint you Dan, but "I'm a Believer" was written by Neil Diamond. Also: Big Bird? a person in a suit. The TV, it lies, it does.

Posted by Boring | May 24, 2007 1:46 PM

"Get off the internet" by Le Tigre would best convey a subtext of hostility towards the blogosphere, and so will clearly be the song chosen.

Posted by ahkiam | May 24, 2007 1:47 PM

"no meaningful downside" to associating herself with Tina Turner? Are you shitting me?

If Hillary = Tina, then ... Bill = Ike.

Posted by The Confidence Man | May 24, 2007 1:48 PM

I picked "I'm a believer". It has the right tempo for a campaign song.

Posted by DonB | May 24, 2007 1:52 PM

I assure everyone that I am well aware of who wrote what songs by the Monkees.

I'm a Believer -> Monkees -> Michael Nesmith

That's all that's required. I'm a Believer is a terrible song by anyone, and was therefore not what I was talking about in my praise. The songs that Nesmith wrote and/or sang, were uniformly great. Dolenz's "Randy Scouse Git" ain't half bad for someone who didn't otherwise do a lot of writing, either.

Posted by Dan | May 24, 2007 2:04 PM

Retaining the loyalty of African-American women is the key to stopping Obama, and Turner is the best way to accomplish that and, as best I can tell, comes with no meaningful downside.

Well, it has some unfortunate precedents: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pknvdBlOels [skip to 5:50 or so]

Posted by Peter | May 24, 2007 2:17 PM

Can someone, anyone, please tell me what "Suddenly I See" is actually about?

Posted by Tracy | May 24, 2007 2:34 PM

Can someone, anyone, please tell me what "Suddenly I See" is actually about?

Posted by Tracy | May 24, 2007 2:35 PM

Suddenly I See seems to be about Tunstall's reaction to a model type. That's how I hear it, anyway. Get's caught right in my head everytime I hear it.

Posted by just sayin | May 24, 2007 2:41 PM

wow, has there ever been a candidate with a better taste in music than Barack Obama? Matt, I love you and all, but you could learn a thing or three from Mr. Obama in this department. What exactly would a "threatening" black man of his age listen to?

Posted by Mike Devlin | May 24, 2007 2:41 PM

Tracy, I wondered the same thing, so I googled it. Here's the first verse.

Her face is a map of the world
Is a map of the world
You can see she's a beautiful girl
She's a beautiful girl
And everything around her is a silver pool of light
The people who surround her feel the benefit of it
It makes you calm
She holds you captivated in her palm

Um... wow.

The rest can be found here.

http://www.lyricsdepot.com/kt-tunstall/suddenly-i-see.html

Posted by LaFollette Progressive | May 24, 2007 2:42 PM

Thanks, just sayin. What an ... odd song, then.

Catchy though.

Posted by Tracy | May 24, 2007 2:44 PM

Uh, so you think she should pick the song by the woman with the abusive, philandering husband?

Posted by Sanjay | May 24, 2007 2:44 PM

Mike... I think I have the unsafe black man list: The Watts Prophets, N.W.A., Sepultura, Bad Brains, KMFDM, Cannibal Corpse, The Last Poets, X-Clan, Professor Griff, really cacophonous Ornette Coleman, Sun Ra, and Juice Newton.

Posted by norbizness | May 24, 2007 2:46 PM

Natalie Allyn Wakeley Sleeth

Posted by kth | May 24, 2007 2:47 PM

Hillary should totally use Kiss' "Strutter" as done by the Donnas. Not saying it would help at all, it would just really rock.

I'm fully committed to whoever picks "Mothership Connection" as their campaign song.

Posted by Cain | May 24, 2007 2:49 PM

wow, has there ever been a candidate with a better taste in music than Barack Obama?

I think Matthew's point is that Obama's "good taste in music" is the sort that a politician trying to craft an image of "what will people think is tasteful when I tell them what music I like?" would come up with.

Posted by Constantine | May 24, 2007 2:51 PM

"Juice Newton."

This is ironic...right? Because, even back in 1970-whatever, I was surprised that a song mentioning cocaine use so blatantly ("layin' down another line") was a top ten hit.

Posted by James Gary | May 24, 2007 2:54 PM

Constantine: Better Coltrane than Better Than Ezra.

Posted by norbizness | May 24, 2007 2:54 PM

“Barack Obama's favorite musicians … are Miles Davis, John Coltrane, Bob Dylan, Stevie Wonder, J.S. Bach, and the Fugees, making him the very model of the modern non-threatening black man.”

“Non-threatening” to whom? This can only be the perception of ignorant bigots, unwilling to recognize or accept the complex diversity of the cultural experience and expressions of black people in America, especially in the area of music, with a history going back to the early origins of gospel and the blues.

It is such ignorant bigotry that makes “black music” into the commercially cultivated stereotypes that prevail today, despite the fact that, ironically, its commercial viability is largely dependent on the taste and spending habits of white middle and upper class consumers.

Posted by Justin | May 24, 2007 2:58 PM

norbizness, as an owner of two professor griff albums and various x clan titles, including the PXO solo album, but a decade and a half younger, I think Obama is a little old for much on your list. Sure he *could* listen to Bad Brains, but seriously? I hope that he's a closet funkateer, though.

If I'm not mistaken, Obama's taste in music as been independently verified on Slate's Obama as Christ watch. Old friends noted that Obama was way into jazz as a college student.

Posted by mike | May 24, 2007 3:03 PM

Better Coltrane than Better Than Ezra

Good point. Better that a politician play it safe rather than make a misguided attempt at trying to be cool.

Posted by Constantine | May 24, 2007 3:05 PM

Hillary's theme song? "Bill" from "Showboat"

Along came Bill
who's not the type at all
He doesn't have a thing
that I can brag about

His form and face
His manly grace
Are not the kind that you
would find in a statue

And I can't explain
It's surely not his brain
that makes me thrill
I love him
Because he's wonderful
Because he's just my Bill.

Posted by Jeffrey Davis | May 24, 2007 3:09 PM

The main claim to fame of the Smashmouth cover of "I'm a Believer" is that it's in Shrek (the first, good one). So maybe they could do a lot of tie-ins and raise some campaign money that way. [Or do all the Dreamworks guys support Obama now?]

Posted by matt | May 24, 2007 3:09 PM

I believe that Suddenly I See is about how a photo of Patti Smith in a magazine inspired Turnstall to become a female rocker. Later in the song there is a verse about being a tower ... it is the sort of female empowerment pop you hear a lot of these days.

I think that it's catchy, but confusion over what the song means is definitely a down-side.

What happened to the Dixie Chick's "Ready to Run"?

Posted by dckatiebug | May 24, 2007 3:33 PM

dckatiebug - I don't think the photo was in a magazine. I believe it was just the cover of Horses, which, shot as it was by Robert Mapplethorpe, is a great photo (accompanying a bloody fantastic album). You have to admire someone superficial enough to be influenced by an album's cover and not the actual music.

I'm surprised that there aren't hordes of righties writing in "The Bitch is Back" by Elton John. One would think that their hatred of teh Hillary would trump their hatred of teh gay.

Posted by Minipundit | May 24, 2007 3:45 PM

I wisht Obama would express his love for the music of Clinton--

George Clinton.

Why not maybe Maggot Brain?

or, man--if Obama's campaign started using "One Nation Under a Groove"--well, it would be unstoppable.

and for his inauguration oath:

Do you promise the funk? The whole funk! And nothing but the funk!

yeah, okay, maybe that wouldn't work so well with the unthreatening black man thang.

Posted by thag | May 24, 2007 4:03 PM

Has anyone ever actually seen HRC and Celine Dion in the same place together? Just saying.

Posted by Alan in SF | May 24, 2007 4:03 PM

Rudy would make the perfect Sir Nose D'voidoffunk

Posted by mike | May 24, 2007 4:16 PM

But seriously, folks:

Anyone who hasn't should check out anyone of Michael Nesmith's First National Band albums. Great, and sadly little noticed, songwriting and music.

I spent an afternoon interviewing Michael once -- he's a fascinating and multi-faceted guy. He pretty much invented the rock video form (for better or worse), besides his Mom inventing White-Out.

Posted by Alan in SF | May 24, 2007 4:23 PM

Much of Ornette Coleman's music is joyful, and Sun Ra just wanted peace. If a candidate wanted to pick scary free jazz, they'd go with Sonny Sharrock and John Zorn.

Posted by American Citizen | May 24, 2007 4:43 PM

Best song for Hillary to use: Jesus Jones' "Right Here, Right Now"

Most appropriate song for the play it safe, boring, cheesy Hillary campaign (i.e., the one they will actually end up using): Starship's "Nothing's Gonna Stop Us Now"

Posted by Dilan Esper | May 24, 2007 5:07 PM

How about Radiohead's Electioneering
"I will stop at nothing, to say the right things when electioneering, I trust I can rely on your vote"
I would also vote for Tokyo Police Club's song Box
"cause I am a fake who sticks to his guns its what I know son and it comes easy to a liar like me"
I think that song is about lying to get with a girl but I figure that works well as a metaphor for naive voters.

I think the Imperial March is the best suggestion so far... maybe it can be GW's campaign song for his third term... Duh Duh Duhn!!!

Posted by Andrew | May 24, 2007 5:14 PM

My suggestion was just general suggestions which I think would work well with any politician... I was not intending to bash Hillary specifically... just wanted to clear that up.

Posted by Andrew | May 24, 2007 5:20 PM

If snarky song suggestions are th order of the day, how 'bout some Pink Floyd?

Come in here, dear boy, have a cigar.
You're gonna go far, fly high,
You're never gonna die, you're gonna make it if you try;they're gonna love you.

Posted by rea | May 24, 2007 5:29 PM

Brian says she should pick The Temptations, but I think Tina Turner is the way to go here. Retaining the loyalty of African-American women is the key to stopping Obama, and Turner is the best way to accomplish that and, as best I can tell, comes with no meaningful downside.

Well, given that criteria, I like "Think!" by Aretha Franklin better.

"You need me (need me) and I need you (don't you know)
Without each other there ain't nothing people can do"

Posted by sara | May 24, 2007 5:41 PM

I'd love Obama to go with REM's These Days.

Posted by Led | May 24, 2007 5:43 PM

Anyone else weirded out by the odd egotism of the songs? I mean: Suddenly I See, Every Little Thing She Does is Magic, The Best (which does make me thing of Ricky Gervais) would all serve as odes to herself, not a call forward.

(If she wanted to do that, but be a little sneakier, I'd suggest Good Vibrations, which is similar lyrically, but most people don't think of it that way).

Of course, the real theme song for the eventual Dem candidate: Time is on My Side.

Posted by Brad L | May 24, 2007 5:54 PM

Or, perhaps that great Grass Roots oldie from the 60s, "Where Were You When I Needed You."

Posted by Alan in SF | May 24, 2007 6:34 PM

You people are all looking at this backwards - do not vote for a good song, vote for an atrocity like the Police song, because if she uses Get Ready, then Get Ready will be ruined forever. Forever. You won't be able to listen to it ever again. I am so so so glad that I'll Take You There escaped this fate. Everybody vote for Celine Dion. Or the Police.

And why do black men have this burden to be threatening? To be proxies for rebellion for pasty college nerdlings like Matt Yglesias, whom I will henceforth equate with that guy in the traffic jam at the beginning of Office Space?

Posted by Phoebe | May 24, 2007 6:58 PM

WE WANT THE FUNK
GOTTA HAVE THAT FUNK!

Obama should definitely use "Chocolate City".

Posted by mq | May 24, 2007 7:52 PM

I support the left, though Im leaning, leaning to the right.
I support the left, though Im leaning to the right.
But Im just not there when its coming to a fight.

Posted by NickS | May 24, 2007 8:02 PM

Non-threatening? You only listened to "Killing me softly" back then, right? You might wanna check out "The Beast" on the same album.

The 666 cut W.I.C. like Newt Gingrich SUCKS DICK

go for it obama!

Posted by novakant | May 24, 2007 8:12 PM

Foo Fighters "Next Year"

I'm in the sky tonight
There I can keep by your side
Watching the wide world riot
And hiding out
I'll be coming home next year

Posted by Dave | May 24, 2007 8:38 PM