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A Committee Should Be Organized to Honor Me

15 Aug 2007 03:22 pm

upandcoming.jpg

You may have read on the internet that Andrew Sullivan is the 46th most powerful person in Washington, but as best I can tell you need to get your hands on a copy of the print GQ to find the real news of the list -- Ross and I are "up and coming" powerful just like the mayor and Susan Rice.

You might be tempted to look at this list and nitpick. Does it really make sense to say that John Podesta is more powerful than Ben Bernanke? Suppose Podesta wanted to cause a global financial meltdown, or plunge the country into recession . . . what he could do about it? Nothing. But then you realize, no, this list must be one hundred percent accurate since it correctly identifies me as one of the centrally important figures of our time.

David Bradley, owner and Supreme Leader of the Atlantic Media Company is also on the list, but since he doesn't have a blog it's difficult for him to brag about it in a somewhat ironic and self-effacing manner. Point being: the Atlantic Media Company and its associated blogs are very, very, very powerful or, in some cases, up and coming as powerful. Be afraid.

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Comments (37)

Andrew Sullivan is the 46th most powerful person in Washington

And with hard work and perseverence, next year he'll be more powerful than that hair stylist who clocks in at #45.

I'd like to say something snarky about Matthew, but it is escaping me at the moment, so I'll just say that's cool. Almost as cool as the Playboy thing a couple of years ago.

Up yours, you authority figure!

Oh, for chrissake!

What a town--the mayor doesn't even make the top 50 most powerful people in the city!

The real question is, where does Officer Krupke rank on the list?

So how much did Atlantic media group pay GQ to get such rankings?

What about the guy that hangs out on Mass Ave during rush hour with the "CATHOLIC PRIESTS MOLEST BOYS WORLDWIDE" sign?

You left off "Take that, Ezra!"

"who look and write alike"

Ok, you look alike because you both have facial hair.

But how do you write alike?

And while I'm on the subject, are there any homeless people on the list? I just thought, since approximately 98% of the DC population is homeless and violently insane, that there should be a representative. I'm torn between the guy I used to see around Thomas Circle with no feet and hair growing out of his forehead and the guy wearing the blonde wig and screaming at fire hydrants on K Street.

'What about the guy that hangs out on Mass Ave during rush hour with the "CATHOLIC PRIESTS MOLEST BOYS WORLDWIDE" sign?'

Can't you read? It clearly says Andrew is 46th on the list.

Their finger is definitely on the pulse of "the Oval":

#9. KARL ROVE

Deputy White House Chief of Staff

Plame hurt. The midterms hurt. But Rove’s still among the few people who get on-demand one-on-one time in the Oval. His legendary—and, after ’06, revenge-oriented—electoral mind will be a valuable resource to the GOP’s eventual nominee.

Crunch.

GQ?

Isn't that the gay magazine that John Edwards reads while he's getting his $400 haircut?

'What about the guy that hangs out on Mass Ave during rush hour with the "CATHOLIC PRIESTS MOLEST BOYS WORLDWIDE" sign?'

Now may be the time for you to accept his sign waving challenge and take the plunge

www.vaticanhidespedophiles.com

Can't you read? It clearly says Andrew is 46th on the list.

Props, Njorl.

Oh come now, Matthew, you can't be honored by any list that claims you write like Ross Douche-hat, as for looking like him, well, I don't think you look like a giant cheesy fetus, but then again, I have a thing for beefy Jubans.

"Beefy"? Is that you, Chris Matthews? Matt doesn't exactly look like Fred Thompson, though.

He was beefy when I had the pleasure of knowing him in the flesh-- when he was my editor at the Independent (that's right, I worked under THE influential Washington Blogging Enfant Terrible Matthew "Mtathew" Yglesias. And I'm single, ladies). Perhaps he's slimmed down from all the fame, adulation, and athletic sex with his many groupies as a result of this article that just came out today.

Either way, MY will ALWAYS my beefy Juban hero!

*be

Now with Catherine & Capp's recent wins it's clear the Flophouse is a media nexus on par with the salons of yore.

"the guy wearing the blonde wig and screaming at fire hydrants on K Street."

Jack Abramoff?

They should have that guy who goes around with a full shopping cart and a globe who hangs out on the grass between Penn Station and the Capitol.

Welcome to Manny's Deli. Our special today is the beefy Juban hero.

Indeed, here's hoping that this doesn't indicate that young Mr. Yglesias will be drawn down the True Path of Hackitude by his homeboy Ross Douthat. Seriously, never mind his general social conserative-pleasing douchebaggery, his brilliant refutation of Wayne Barrett was best addressed by Roy Edroso:

Even without answering a single point in the story -- or in any other "unfair" piece of reportage -- Douthat says that its publication in the Voice "makes me automatically inclined to approach it with more skepticism that it may deserve."

As Tim Allen might have put it, don't stand too close to a dishonest authoritarian-cheering little shit, Mr. Yglesias.

Oh yeah, Ugh-lazy-ass?

Wait a minute -- it just occured to me that I look an awful lot like Tom Toles ...

Hmmm ...

Given Matt's status as up-and-coming important person, do you think he could be persuaded to use his influence to get us all good-paying jobs? Hell, even basketball tickets would be cool . . .

Anyone listed after number 13 really needs to work on their communication skills (and personal appearance/hygeine, etc...)

Hmmmm..... Addled thinking, pathological narcissism, complete obliviousness about how much one doesn't know -- all things for which DC is noted. So what I don't get is, why didn't darling Andy make the #1 slot? He's the poster boy for those virtues!

Ross Douthat is the human equivalent of dry white toast.

I just thought, since approximately 98% of the DC population is homeless and violently insane, that there should be a representative.

Stop it with the sockpuppetry, David Sirota.

The list includes a dead person, a hair stylist, and the manager of a branch of a steak-house chain (it's not just that he's a restaurant manager, but the manager of a CHAIN). By the way, what sort of sorry-ass town can't even generate it's own steak-house, but has to import one from New York so that Grover Norquist can eat dead cowflesh?

The list is silly - Condo Rice is not the most powerful person in DC besides Bush and Cheney. Not anywhere near. It's pretty clear that no one in the administration takes her seriously as anything but a talking head. Plus, David Rubinstein and Bill Conway at Carlyle should be way higher on the list.

Uh, chimichangachap, Magazines never lie. You should know what by now, if you've been reading the Pedantic, and those bastions of truthiness, Timely and Newsweak. GeekU is accurate too, but not as accurate as Inanity unFair.

(Lisa turns on the tape of "Lisa Simpson, Girl Cowboy." In it, Lisa's face is crudely pasted on a cowgirl's body. The animation is really choppy.)
Cowgirl: Howdy, pardners! My name is sheriff...
Homer voiceover: Lisa Simpson!
Cowgirl: I sure am hungry for my favorite food...
Homer voiceover: McNuggets!
Lisa: I don't like McNuggets! I'm a vegetarian!
Homer: Still? Well then you're not gonna like your other present!
(We see a turkey in wrapping paper!)
(In the film a male cowboy rides up)
Cowgirl: Why it's my best friend...
Homer voiceover: Maggie!
Lisa: (in reality) Huh?
Bartender: (enters from a saloon) Bad news sheriff...
Homer voiceover: Lisa Simpson!
Bartender: Some Indians took all the...
Homer voiceover: McNuggets! Mmmm McNuggets... haughughalughalugh!
Cowgirl: I'll get those no good Indians, just as sure as my favorite book is...
Homer voiceover: Magazines! Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...
Bart voiceover: Wake up, Dad!
Homer voiceover: Huh wha?
(Static fills the screen as Lisa shuts off the TV in anger.)

Whatever your power wattage, it clearly is superior to Ross Douthat's.

So even as a silly list, it is silly.

Hairstylist Isabelle Goetz is more powerful than the mayor of DC? What garbage.

And really, the director of admissions for St. Albans is more powerful than every SCOTUS justice except Kennedy? I hate magazine lists.

"Perhaps he's slimmed down..."

Not if the Yearly KOS video on TPM was any indication.

Of course everybody looks fatter on video...:-)

Who is this guy again?

ok, you and Ross on the up-and-comer list...Rice? I think she's earned a spot ON the list. The funny one is Putnam...that poor guy! He's been on "up and comer" lists for like 10 years now! When are the Republicans gonna let him sit at the big kid table?


Comments closed August 29, 2007.

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