I've Got Kitty Pryde And Nightcrawler, Too

Via Tyler Cowen, we learn that:

Marc Grossman, the U.S. ambassador to Turkey in the mid-1990s, recalled telling his staff to take their own security precautions. After losing embassy employees to attacks, he advised staffers to keep a six-sided die in their glove compartments; to thwart ambushes, they should assign a different route to work to each number, he said, and toss the die as they left home each morning.

Does anyone other than hard-core nerds specify that they're talking about a six-sided die? I feel like normal people don't even realize that they make other kinds.

Photo by Flickr user Colinrego used under a Creative Commons license

Comments

Well, at least he didn't call it a d6, or refer to the employees who always avoided ambush as having 'Turkeywalk.'

Posted by Neil the Ethical Werewolf | October 22, 2007 8:47 PM

depending on how you define normal (esp. if it has an age component), they might not recognize Weezer lyrics either...

Posted by dgj | October 22, 2007 8:52 PM

The whole concept is awkward.

"Hey man, keep a die in your glove compartment . . ." is really no better--so fussy.

He could've just said, "vary your route to work."

Posted by southpaw | October 22, 2007 8:53 PM

What - didn't everyone play D&D?

Posted by McKingford | October 22, 2007 9:01 PM

Only the cool people, McKingford.

Posted by Captain Noble | October 22, 2007 9:11 PM

Normal people automatically have a -3 savings throw against common sense so it probably is necessary to state it's a 6-sided die.

Posted by tom.a | October 22, 2007 9:12 PM

In my experience people who work for State hardly qualify as "normal". The typical State Department employee is an intelligent yet humorless and strangely narrow-minded type of person. They aren't really nerds but they certainly aren't the cool kids, they were probably the suck-ups who got good grades by spewing back what the teacher told them to think and didn't get invited to the good parties. In a word, Harvard types. But I can imagine there could be some D&D players there.

Posted by vanya | October 22, 2007 9:17 PM

The journalistic problem is obvious: the phrase "keeps a die in their glove compartment" would confuse readers because "die" has another more common meaning, especially in an article about how the subject could die. So he says "six-sided die" to make clear the meaning. The languagelog guys probably have a word for this.

Posted by old guy | October 22, 2007 9:20 PM

Southpaw ... the problem is, if you tell people that, some of them will end up unconsciously following a pattern.

Posted by Nicholas Beaudrot | October 22, 2007 9:21 PM

Indeed, it's uncommon for someone who never played D&D to even realize that the proper singular form of "dice" is "die."

Posted by Greg | October 22, 2007 9:29 PM

True Greg.

Also, it is nice to see that Matt is one of us.

Posted by d | October 22, 2007 9:32 PM

What about rewriting the phrase as "he advised staffers to keep 1d6 in their glove compartments;"? "1d6" is much shorter than "a six-sided die."

Posted by Julian Elson | October 22, 2007 9:48 PM

FWIW, from personal experience, using 6,12, and/or 20 sided die to randomize the implementation of various anti-terror measures has been an official part of military force protection policy for at least ten years

Posted by Kenny | October 22, 2007 9:55 PM

Then there's the other question: would it matter if they used a 4, 8, or 12 sided die? Would these somehow serve the purpose less well?

Posted by Ben V-L | October 22, 2007 9:56 PM

My girlfriend and I have a similar system. We keep a die on the bedside table. I always hope for a six or a four...........

Posted by steve duncan | October 22, 2007 10:03 PM

Every joke I could think of has already been made, but my favorite is

Normal people automatically have a -3 savings throw against common sense so it probably is necessary to state it's a 6-sided die.

Posted by Vorpal Sword | October 22, 2007 10:16 PM

Funny, I've had that weezer song in my head all day for an entirely different reason.

Also, the more sides on the die, the more random the route, the safer you are. So if I were one of these guys I'd be rolling percentile dice. (Yes, I'm a nerd too.)

Posted by eric | October 22, 2007 10:28 PM

"he advised staffers to keep 1d6 in their glove compartment;"

I'd say "1d6 what? 1d6 gold pieces? 1d6 rabbits?" "1d6" is an amount, not a thing.

Now, I might say "a d6" to refer to a 6-sided die, but not "1d6".

Posted by KCinDC | October 22, 2007 10:37 PM

he advised staffers to keep a six-sided die in their glove compartments; to thwart ambushes

Dude, that's what your Detect Evil spell is for! Honestly...

Posted by sweaty guy | October 22, 2007 10:43 PM

Dice terminology aside, I'm still bitter about the changes made back in 2000, when they came out with the the 3rd Edition Neo-Con Foreign Policy rules. Before that, the emphasis was on interaction and role-playing. Now it's all totally hack-and-slash.

Posted by James Gary | October 22, 2007 10:52 PM

I would personally keep a giant bag of d4's in my glove compartment and when I suspect I'm being followed, I would dump the whole bag out of the car window. They are the next best thing to caltrops.

Posted by Everett | October 22, 2007 10:55 PM

old guy is right: it's just a subeditor's way to use the correct singular form 'die' without its homonym meanings making the sentence disruptive to the reader. The alternative might have been to rewrite in a way that allowed 'dice' in a plural construction, but adding 'six-sided' is more elegant.

Posted by pseudonymous in nc | October 22, 2007 11:13 PM

"Only the cool people, McKingford."

You'd be surprised how many inmates in Federal prison play D&D and other RPG.

At least until somebody gets upset at the Dungeon Master and stabs him, then they ban the game...

I had never played before being in the joint, and I gave up when I released that inmate DM's are just incapable of cutting the other players a break...big surprise...

Posted by Richard Steven Hack | October 22, 2007 11:28 PM

Sigh...Preview, Richard, preview...

"when I realized..."

"Released" came MUCH later...

Posted by Richard Steven Hack | October 22, 2007 11:31 PM

Anyone else here see Wet Hot American Summer?

"Oh, no, we need to find a way to generate random numbers between 1 and 20 to stop the meteorite!"

"No problem! Every dungeonmaster carries a 20-sided die!"

Posted by Glaivester | October 22, 2007 11:48 PM

If there's something I've learnt from living in NOVA for the last three years, it's that the Pentagon and the intelligence community in general is chock-full of D&D nerds (and don't get me started with the patent office...).

Posted by El Cruzado | October 23, 2007 12:06 AM

"You'd be surprised how many inmates in Federal prison play D&D and other RPG."

No, I wouldn't, 'cause I know some of 'em. I was surprised when I was much younger and found out how popular it was in the military.

Posted by Captain Noble | October 23, 2007 12:55 AM

Wait'll you feel the sting of my Flame sword +8, Yglesias.

Posted by Freddie | October 23, 2007 1:09 AM

I guess the expression the Venus Throw means nothing to you.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Venus_Throw

Posted by beowulf | October 23, 2007 1:20 AM

Normies hear d3 and think "The Mighty Ducks," right?

Posted by Emilio Estevez | October 23, 2007 4:33 AM

Very sensible. Indian troops in Kashmir used a similar technique (actually pulling bits of paper out of a hat) to randomize patrol routes along the LoC and improve their chances of catching Muslim infiltrators.

Posted by ajay | October 23, 2007 4:36 AM

I'll just suggest that the 4-sided die option should be ruled out because rolling a 4-sided die is a totally unsatisfying experience. It doesn't skip across the tabe, it just goes thud. Plus it's weird, because you have to read the bottom number because there's no top side on a pyramid.

Posted by Bill | October 23, 2007 8:07 AM

I'm so old.

Posted by Jeffrey Davis | October 23, 2007 8:18 AM

"Alea iacta est"--did Julius Caesar play D&D?

Posted by rea | October 23, 2007 9:02 AM

When things got ugly, he gave everyone gold plated d20s for Christmas presents.

For some reason, I always knew I was in good company reading Matt's blog.

Posted by Level 15 Ranger | October 23, 2007 9:16 AM

I have no jokes to add, but: Best thread ever. Bravo, people, bravo.

Posted by Aragorn | October 23, 2007 11:02 AM

Old school authenticity gauge:

Your first set of D&D dice had rounded corners & appeared inexpertly molded, and -- you had to color the top half of your d20 orange, because it had 2 sets of 0-9 -- too clumsy an engraver to fit in the numbers 11-20 apparently.

Posted by Bill | October 23, 2007 11:48 AM

No advice on whether to keep posters on the wall of his favorite rock group, Kiss.

Nice shout-out to your Crimson homeslice, Riv. Cuomo, Matty.

Posted by Jamey | October 23, 2007 12:07 PM

Damn, rolling a natural 20 was one of the sweetest feelings back in the day.

And hey, what's with the Harvard bashing? Go Crimson! Adams House rules! Dunster House drools!

You may now return to your regular comments, already in progress.

Posted by NCProsecutor | October 23, 2007 12:17 PM

"Your first set of D&D dice had rounded corners & appeared inexpertly molded, and -- you had to color the top half of your d20 orange, because it had 2 sets of 0-9 -- too clumsy an engraver to fit in the numbers 11-20 apparently."

Sadly, I've reached the point where being labled "old school" officially depresses me. Does anyone have a "Reverse Age" spell they'd be willing to trade for?

Posted by DS in SF | October 23, 2007 12:26 PM

So if staffers do encounter an attack after using this method, do they get a bonus to their initiative and/or relfex saves? Does it help to negate sneak attack damage? Is "embassy staff" a base class or a prestige class? How will all of this pan out come 4th ed.? So many questions...

Posted by Shawn | October 23, 2007 1:16 PM

There are actually five Platonic solids: the tetrahedron, hexahedron (or cube), octahedron, dodecahedron, and icosahedron, any of which could be made into a die.

Now, what do you mean by "hard-core" nerd?

Posted by Mike | October 23, 2007 1:40 PM

A cube of cheese, no larger than a single die,
Will bait the trap, to catch the nibbling mie.

Posted by serial catowner | October 23, 2007 2:22 PM

Woot!
Geek pride!
Represent!

Posted by Anthony Damiani | October 23, 2007 9:21 PM