« Omnihanlon | Main | 21! » Tabling Elliot Spitzer14 Mar 2008 07:20 pm For the latest edition of The Table we brought Megan McArdle on board so as to marginalize Ross' quaint anti-prostitution views while our crack production team devised a newer, bigger, better, and even more absurd intro sequence: It's also, technically speaking, a different table. Comments (49)
Matthew, Did I hear you well? Did you say that there is no harm done in cases of prosecutorial misconduct? That since defendants are normally guilty it's ok? And even if innocent they can go to court to prove their innocence? 
Why were you pictured hanging around outside in formal business attire ? The three of you look like you were trying to avoid hidden police microphones or slipping out for smokes during a wake.
Great. I have work to do tonight, and now my eyes are bleeding. There's no way to delicately put this, but Ambinder is seriously obese. I don't mind reading his stuff, and don't hold against him, but seriously, some allowances have to be made for being on a visual medium. He doesn't just have a double chin, he has a double head. It's not even disgusting or anything like that -- just mesmerizing in a way that makes it impossible to track the dialogue.
You can see Marcel modeling on page 34 of this week's "GQ," I'm sure.
So fucking what? Fattist cotchramp.
So you're saying he's too fat for you even to focus on the argument? And he has a problem, not you?
"Great. I have work to do tonight, and now my eyes are bleeding." bwahahahaha. I'm sorry Matt, I love you and your blog, but that was the funniest thing I read all day. Well, the second funniest... I spent a good 15 minutes ROTFL at johnmccainisyourjalopy.com
When did it become quaint to hold anti-prositution views?
I assume that you do this as practice for That-Time-Timmy-or-Chris-is-Going-to=Call, but really, this is just painful. Like freshman dorm cable access channel painful. Stick the writing, guys.
Nothing against Ambinder, who sounds smart and I'm sure is a swell fellow, but Marcel just had me laughing so hard my head hurt. That was the funniest Table/Ambinder comment since Michesmith's question on the fatboat thread. I think the intros to The Table are the best. They should be expanded. Maybe one with Ambinder riding his Vespa scooter to the Atlantic offices, followed by footage of Megan biking and then Matt driving his Prius there or something. Then you could all be in the front row of a comedy club and smile and clink champagne glasses like in the intro to the Jerry Show.
How about we instead show footage of Megan meeting homeless veterans who actually exist and aren't less than fifty years old. Her head just might explode.
I commented at Arbinder's blog but:
Matt, the real tragedy here is the way you've wasted your chance at the big microphone. It seems as though, time and time again, you're engaging the same people. It's just another elite village with new names and faces and content of arguably slightly better quality. The other thing, and this is going to smart a bit, stay off TV. Same goes for mcmegan and ambinder. You're a writer. You have no presentation skills that suit you for video (or radio for that matter). Don't do video just because you can, write because that's where your skills lie. I know this is harsh, I'm sorry. I'm also firmly convinced it's true. If and when you develop some unique, insightful or particularly entertaining visual skills, take a whack at video. Until then, sit down and write your as off. Oh, and the same goes double for ambinder. mcmegan, well, I'll leave that bit out. Oh, an before you go rationalizing my critique, it's not about pretty (even the eyes bleeding comment was funny because it was hyperbole). It's about being more than a lump in a chair (again, not just you, all three of you). If you insist on doing video, get some media training.
Oh, and that intro, sweet jumpin' jeebus on a rusty poo stick, please. Whoever did that should be subjected some form of saudi justice. That was a crime against humanity.
Love it, ice weasel.
I love The Table, but what was with the lighting? As someone who has dabbled in filmmaking it was really distracting to see each of you lighted so differently, and McMegan looked like she was a 48 year old who was acting in a movie about someone with the traumatic medical condition of being enveloped in shadows at all times. Other than that, it was amusing as always. Keep 'em coming.
"Crack production team? So you want to legalize that too? What is going on in the Atlantic?" They have all the writers, stripped naked, standing around a table packaging drugs, sorta like in American Gangster (except not). "For the latest edition of The Table we brought Megan McArdle on board" [comment deleted by author due to inappropriate and unfounded speculation]
Different intro. Did any of them mention that Spitz changed the MotorVoter rules, and how that helps illustrate just how corrupt the leaders of the Democratic Party are? Bonus: did Ambinder discuss how he missed a big story and has shown no interest in following up (lonewacko.com/blog/archives/007477.html)?
Ah, the Kellybot is back. Of course, the reason it blogwhores and begs people to ask its nativist questions is because he's not going to come out from under the bed until Steve Sailer tells him all the nasty brown folks have gone away. Whack O'Mole: twice the ho of the Emperor's Club list, at a fraction of the price.
I rarely enjoy the Table excersizes, but the MMJ "Gideon" intro was fantastic...but it should have lasted long enough to hear the epic opening vocal lines. Now that I've accumulated enough rock and roll dork points, I'd like to reiterate that these videos are not very interesting.
Not CRACK crack. CraAack.
I agree with those who say the intro needs to be even more ridiculous..er...exciting and action packed, I mean. I suggest something along the lines of the WPVI Philadelphia Action News opening.
WTF? 1. Ambinder should avoid the funny.
So far I am impressed with MY's "Knowing" looks... (The same look you get out of a cat in water based skits) "I am ABOVE THIS!!!!!"....
I don't think these three need any special media training to be on TV. The main thing that separates their demeanor from that of typical talking heads on cable news is that they all seem calm and content. After all, they're young, well-paid, have jobs they like, and are living in the sort of urban milieu that most white twenty- and early thirty-somethings aspire to. Instead of "media skills" training, they need to cultivate some personal and professional conflicts and challenges so they can come across as more angry and opinionated on TV.
I would like to insult you and give you unsolicited advice. Please read my comment I HAVE IMPORTANT INSIGHTS THAT CAN HELP YOUR CAREER!!
WEASEL ICE DEMANDS THAT YOUR FREE CONTENT MEET HIS STANDARDS!!!
LTB HAS MANY IMPORTANT QUESTIONS ABOUT HOW MUCH YOU SUCK!!
You know, even apart from being ... well, let's just say a bit more photogenic than the other denizens of The Table ... Ms. McArdle, if this is any example, comes off as much sharper intellectually in this venue than she does on the printed page. Or maybe it was just that I agreed with everything she said.
Tips for next time: 1. Put gauze over the camera lens during MattY's segments, maybe just light his eyes. 2. Add a laugh track when Ambinder makes jokes. 3. Have Megan "sex it up" a bit. 4. Put out slices of melon and other fruits, and have them throw it at each other. 5. Lesbians!
All you people want is more, more, more, more. Leave The Table alone! Notes:
You have a surprisingly high-pitched voice.
And Ambinder looks like a giant, melting, twelve year old.
And Ambinder looks like a giant, melting, twelve year old. Now that's f-ing funny.
were i a writer for SNL i would lift this entire absurd exchange.
Jeez Louise, I thought we'd lost McArdle. Nah gah watch this.
Cheers on the melting 12 year old remark. Hilarious. Pointlessly cruel, but funny. And speaking of 12 year olds, there were pre-teen youtube viewers who thought that opening was amateurish.
Matt, I'm not saying you have to act like a network anchor or anything, but would it kill you not to be chewing gum in the intro? I think the last person I saw chewing gum on TV was Britney Spears.
How many Oreos does it take to get that physique? Cause my parents are thinking of increasing my allowance and I want to know how much I should ask for.
You know what's really cute? When kids put on neck ties. They look like little adults!
Very amusing, Adam. (Dude, post more. Bring the pain.) And, geesh, if you think this has been sad, be sure to check out the comments on Megan McArdle's page, at least half of which run along the lines of "Great job, Meg! I'm typing this with one hand!" Granted, she has a libertarian readership and we all know what that means, but still. You have to feel a bit sorry for her. At least she came prepared, which is more than we can say for young Matt. What's more, Matt seemed inexplicably smug for someone who showed up without having done the reading. Still, even if he was in way over his head, our smug hero was rocking one damn cool Arlington, Virginia Mens Wearhouse look!
giant, melting, twelve year old. wow. i was thinking he looked like a matryoshka doll, and if you opened him up there'd be another little Ambinder inside. though i would request more of Mcardle, she's like a low-rent (albeit smarter) Evangeline Lilly.
Making negative comments about a person's appearance is dim stuff. Making anonymous, negative comments about a person's appearance is beyond infantile.
"our crack production team" I see somebody beat me to it. But yeah, your production team - not to mention the wannabe pundits - are obviously all on crack.
"I think the last person I saw chewing gum on TV was Britney Spears." Hey, Matt's just been out of college for four years. So his perception of the world is only slightly more advanced that Britney's "We should trust our President!" Gum chewing is what he DOES. McArdle as Evangeline Lilly? Have you seen Lilly on talk shows? She's incredibly funny and nuts. McMegan would have a ways to go. But, yeah, I'd say more Megan vs Ross. Or better yet, get rid of Ambinder - who is seriously useless - and have Megan, Ross and - well, if we have to - Matt. BTW, somebody stuff a sock in Matt's mouth so he'll talk at more of a normal volume. Also, give him a sedative so he'll talk more slowly. Matt, order this book and follow the advice: http://www.amazon.com/Molloys-Live-Success-John-Molloy/dp/0688004121
I think McMegan's hot, but then I dig intelligence.
Megan is the best dressed but everyone looks sharp.
Splitzer had to read the essay on prostitution "A She-Savior" by the well-known Russian author Mikhail Armalinsky. It was published in Moscow edition of his Selected Works http://www.mipco.com/english/introVozn.html The main idea of the essay "A She-Savior" is that the legalization of prostitution must be based on a return of its divine, sacred character, so that prostitution will be considered the most honorable profession, the one closest to God, the holiest.
Comments closed March 28, 2008. |
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Heads in the Sand
Crack production team? So you want to legalize that too? What is going on in the Atlantic?
PS. Please, do not believe this comment.
Posted by piotr | March 14, 2008 7:47 PM